Friday, 1 August 2014

If I've Got No Say, I Won't Pay

The Foreplay:

Hey everyone, I'd like to write a quick (and likely inflammatory) post about something we can ALL relate to in some fashion...

Baby mamas and daddies...

Yup, the age old issue of unexpected pregnancies and one of the most common disputes to arise from the surprise situation.

Core Play:

Okay I don't want any 'short foreplay' jokes here folks, this one's a quick so let's just accept that fact and move on to the good stuff.

You have undoubtedly heard of a situation where two people have bumped uglies and, unintentionally found themselves holding a little stick with a "+" sign showing on it. There are a number of reactions to the glorious miracle of impending new life and many of them are full of joy and laughter... Yeah I'm not here to talk about those, sorry.

I'm here to talk about the argument that comes up when one side of the fraternizing folks doesn't want to keep the child and the other does. This doesn't matter to me if it is given up for adoption or aborted, the core issue is the disagreement over the ultimate fate of the child and by extension, the fates of the two parents-to-be-or-not-to-be.

What typically happens is the old "it's a woman's body, therefore she gets the ultimate decision". I have no problem with this (in theory) however in practice his has been used by some women to try and trap men into either 1. Staying with them romantically when the man may otherwise wish to leave a relationship OR 2. To force a man to pay child support which then may, or may not be mis-used by the ne'er do well baby mama to buy shoes and clothes for herself rather than taking care of well... You know... That child mentioned in the whole "child support" term.

Here's my view, and yes, be prepared for inside-your-head notings of "shots fired" because this is probably going to ruffle a feather or two out on the interwebs:

If two people engage in sexual activity where it is stated (honestly or otherwise) that they do NOT wish to have a child via the sexual action, and any form of contraception is used (take the pill, pull it out, wrap-it-before-you-tap-it, I really don't care just pick your poison) however pregnancy occurs then:

  1. The woman gets the ultimate say in whether or not to attempt to carry the child to term.

  2. If the man does not wish for the child to be carried to term, no child support need be paid by the father.

I know what you're probably thinking... "But Josh, it takes two to tango, he's responsible for that child!" Here's where you're wrong. If you take reasonable precautions, state that you do NOT want a child from the get-go, but you're still not given a choice in whether or not the child is brought into the world, you should not be made financially responsible for a situation that you have no control over.

I'm telling you, if this were the case you'd see a LOT more women carrying condoms (seriously, you ladies get to decide whether or not we get to use it... You should be at least willing to shoulder the same responsibility of making sure it's wrapped... Equality and whatnot), likely fewer unexpected pregnancies, and the incident rates of women trapping men by intentionally getting pregnant after deceiving a man would sink to zero since well... Getting yourself knocked up would no longer be a viable source of income.

The Afterglow:

Was that as good for you as it was for me? Yeah? No? Either way, stop off at the comments section at the bottom of this page and leave your opinions, I DO actually want to hear them.

As always, enjoy your swim folks!

Joshua J. Taylor